David could feel and almost hear the pounding of his heart as he waited for the car in front of him to make the turn. "Why is this guy allowed to drive?" David thought, as several cars passed him in the other lane.
Davis was late for a meeting that he didn't want to be a part of in the first place. It was going to be a meeting, like most of the other meetings, that made him wonder; what's the purpose? But neither of those questions would make a difference in his situation.
David was part of a committee that was meant to make positive changes, both in his organization and out in his city. But, it seemed that all the committee did was have meetings and not get much done. Every suggestion and recommendation that was action focused and had the potential to make real, positive changes was met with resistance and/or a flat rejection.
David was at his wits end. He liked the people on the committee. He wanted to continue working with them, but he didn't know what to do with the mounting frustration and the lack of real change that was taking place.
Like David, the apostle Paul went through a time when his frustration reached an all time high. When honestly confronted with his situation, he didn't know what to do. As a religious leader and teacher, he knew that he and the other religious leaders he was around were supposed to be making positive changes in the world by helping people to know God and to do what God wanted them to do.
Unfortunately, all he saw happening was people being made miserable by their inability to follow new sets of rules. And those rules didn't help people to really get to know God intimately. He saw that the harder he pushed inside his religious circles and the harder he pushed the people, the worst things got.
Then Paul finally heard the voice of God for himself. When he heard God’s voice, God simply asked him two questions; 1). Why are you persecuting me [mistreating and driving me away] and 2). Don’t you find it hard to kick against the goads [prodding sticks, my directional resistance]? (Take a look at Acts 9:1-6)
If we’re finding ourselves increasingly stressed and frustrated and it’s more because of unnecessary roadblocks that seem to constantly come for no good reason, then it could be that we’re going in a wrong direction. We might actually be trying to drive Jesus away by our actions and attitudes.
And what was Paul’s response when he heard God's questions? He asked the only question that he could. He asked, “Lord, what would you have me to do?” His response, asking, Jesus, what is it that you really want me to be doing showed that Paul was willing and committed to doing whatever God wanted him to do.
If we find ourselves in continually stressful, frustrating and seemingly useless situations, maybe we should ask ourselves the questions Jesus asked and see if we’re truly committed to responding like Paul.
Let’s start by asking four basic questions:
Am I persecuting Jesus? Am trying to drive Jesus away with my attitudes and actions?
Am I kicking against the goads? Am I hurting myself by constantly trying to do things and/or going in directions that move me away from the direction that God is actually leading?
Am I willing and committed to do whatever God wants me to do?
What do you really what me to be doing Lord?
As David pulled into the parking lot, he took a deep breath, quieted himself, asked himself those four questions and prayed. Now, he was ready to go into the meeting.